Divine Purposes

Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." Matthew 26:39

During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered and, once made perfect, became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him... Hebrews 5:7 (emphasis mine)


The question of "why".... I would definitely say that I have struggled with "why" over the past 3 years. Some of those struggles you have witnessed on our blog. Why did we not get pregnant? Why does God choose to give children to those not following Him or who can't handle the responsiblity? Why is there suffering? There are a million whys out there. Now I'm not going to claim that I have the answer to the "why" question, but I will say that I have been given a peace recently about the "why" question. Let me explain....

I recently found the above verses while doing a Beth Moore study through the women's ministry at our church. They couldn't have come to me at a more appropriate time! As I looked more closely at the verses, and myself, I realized that sometimes I just don't feel heard, especially if I don't get my way. Case in point, our fertility struggles. I felt, to some extent, that God was just ignoring all the prayer for children and all the scripture we'd been praying. Knowing that God is good is the only thing that kept me going when I just didn't understand. The truth is I may never understand this side of heaven. Does that mean God doesn't hear us? Absolutely not. I was really put in my place after reading those scriptures (oh, the sweet discipline of our Lord)! Jesus Christ, God's only son pled not to have to endure death on a cross. Take this cup from me he asked. Our Lord was saying, please, please let there be another way! And he was heard. Let me say that again, he was heard. Did that mean that God changed His plan? No, thank goodness! Sometimes our very valid requests, even our scripturally based requests, are outside God's plan. Sometimes divine purposes take precedence. Imagine if God had said to Jesus, "Okay, you are my Son, since you desperately want this, I'll grant your request. I'll take this cup from you." I would be in some sort of desperate, alone, guiltridden mess. I would be eternally separated from our Lord! How thankful I am that God does what is best, not what we want!

Now it is still a tough pill to swallow. The implications of all this is something I will be working out for a long time to come. But it is a comfort to me that there are divine purposes at work here. I may never understand them, but they are there. I know they are because God is good. I know they are because He chose salvation over His Son. I know they are because it is only due to the work God is doing on my heart that I can walk through this trial. I know that they are because right now our child is being prepared for us half way around the world! God is good!